Paloma Faith: ‘I’m yet to meet somebody who’s on a par with me’

When Tom Ford, the biggest name to show at London Fashion Week — ever, chooses two of your songs for his show and describes you as a fashion icon, you could be excused for getting ideas about yourself. ‘I’m an enormous fan and find her voice incredibly powerful,’ Ford told ES. ‘She has amazing personal style and isn’t afraid to take fashion risks. I loved her outfit at the BAFTAs, I couldn’t take my eyes off of her.’ So far, so glamorous. Except, when I meet Paloma a couple of days later, she’s in a dressing room saying she wouldn’t even care if she had to do today’s shoot topless ‘because my breasts are so small it wouldn’t matter. They’re so little, they don’t even count as sexual.’ As the tangles are brushed out of her orange hair, and concealer painted over a spot, she discusses how long you can go without washing a bra.

‘I smell it every morning,’ she explains, ‘just to check if it’s all right — a black bra can do a few weeks! Except I do have sex. If I think someone’s going to see my underwear, then I make an extra-special effort. But recently that’s not often the case, which is both liberating and lonely!’ Smelly bra, big gob, gagging for a shag… Paloma Faith may not be turning into a celebrity princess any time soon — you might even say she’s the anti-Tom Ford glam-azon — but she’s totally refreshing company.

These past few weeks have been something of a turning point for the singer: she’s just come home from a ‘moving’ sold-out UK tour where cheering audiences sang along to hits from her albums Fall To Grace and Do You Want The Truth Or Something Beautiful? (combined sales now 1.1 million and counting). Indeed, it’s the night before the Brit Awards, for which Faith is nominated for British Album of the Year and Best Female Solo Artist (she accurately predicts that she won’t win, but will spend the night ‘smiling so much that your face feels like it’s going to fall off’). Then there was that BAFTAs performance, when half of Hollywood wanted to chat to her — more of which later. And she’s finally bought herself a house in Notting Hill, something that has given her ‘a profound sense of security I’ve never previously had. I think I used to look for it in men.’

But fame also brings with it the inevitable weirdos. On the tour, an old songwriting colleague gave his backstage pass to a fan, who blagged his way into Paloma’s dressing room. ‘I said, “It’s lovely to meet you but I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” I was really shaken up. Recently I can feel that people know who I am and it feels a bit… dangerous. I called that guy [the colleague] up and had such a go at him. I think he just thought I was the old happy-go-lucky girl he’d always known, and I still am, but back then there was nobody who might have been weird with me.’

Paloma, 31, grew up in Hackney, the daughter of an English mother and a Spanish father, who left when she was four. She trained as a dancer at the Northern School of Contemporary Dance in Leeds, returning to London to study for an MA in theatre directing at Central Saint Martins (she is creative director of her tours and videos, with strong ideas on everything including the lighting). The singing, however, was all self-taught.

In her youth there were good times, but also a lot of darkness. She talks about being ‘raised around addiction’, about an ex-boyfriend who nearly killed her, about some dark roads she has travelled down. Her way out was to never touch drugs herself — and to be funny. ‘I’ve always used humour as a survival mechanism. To escape sad things. My whole family’s like that, we rip the person in the coffin to f***ing shreds at their funeral. I think it’s the only way to get through it.’

Still, her mother also raised her to be turned out well, and always in matching underwear, which may be why Paloma ended up working at Agent Provocateur for three years. ‘Not that I looked right when I started: I had the vintage-style clothes they liked but I couldn’t do my hair at all. They were like,’ she rolls her eyes. ‘ “Can somebody sort Paloma out, please.” Ha-ha!’ It’s not just the hair on her head that she’s had to learn to deal with. ‘I’m a feminist. I don’t believe in taking all the… pubic hair off, but then I don’t want to be completely feral, so I think I’ve recently found my perfect vaginal state. But it’s taken a while. Sometimes I put the trimmer on the wrong setting and then I feel awful because I’ve taken too much off! And then sometimes I go on tour for two months and forget the trimmer and it’s just all… there.’

And does her mum, who sent her to dance classes when she was small, enjoy the pop-star stuff? ‘She’s very supportive, but last time she came to a show she announced to the entire catering staff: “It’s all very well, this limelight, but I haven’t got grandchildren.” In my area there was a lot of teenage pregnancy and she always used to say, “If it happens to you, we can look after it together!” A while ago I told her I was going to New York for a couple of months and she said [adopts conspiratorial low voice], “Come home pregnant.” I was like, “Mum! I want to be with someone first!” ’

About being with someone, Paloma has gone from boyfriend to boyfriend since her teens, men who are not usually as successful as her, waiters or barmen with addiction-recovery issues. ‘So I’ve made myself promise I’ll stay single for five months. I wanted to say six but it sounded too daunting.’ But Paloma loves love and says she’s a romantic. Unfortunately, this can backfire. ‘I once turned up at a boyfriend’s work in a Victorian horse and carriage to take him for dinner. He was a bit embarrassed, he said he could hear the hooves all the way down Wardour Street. Ha-ha-ha! We were riding through the streets and he just stayed crouched inside the carriage, trying to hide behind the little curtains.’ They managed to get through another year together, but Paloma really needs to find someone who actually gets off on this sort of thing. ‘I need to be with someone who’s capable of thinking that way, too, but I’m yet to meet somebody who’s on a par with me in that sense.’ She goes quiet, brow furrowing slightly. ‘It does take bravery.’

Running into Sarah Jessica Parker at the BAFTAs, Paloma thought she’d ask for love advice. ‘She came over to me after I sang and I forgot for a minute that she wasn’t actually Carrie, I really thought I was talking to her character. So I was like, “I don’t meet successful men, how do I do that?” And she goes, “Oh, you really need to change that, that’s no good for you.” And I said, “But how? I’ve chatted to them tonight but how do you get to the point where you go, shall we go out?” ’

Paloma then reflects on how mad the BAFTAs were for her. Samuel L Jackson, George Clooney, Marion Cotillard and Michael Fassbender all introduced themselves. Rafe Spall, who knows her from her acting days, stood beside her like a proud uncle, informing everyone that she’s a great actress, too. She has been in films including St Trinian’s and The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, by Terry Gilliam, who loved that she turned up to audition in her own wild clothes. She’s keen to act again, but only if she can play a character totally different from herself, like Mariah Carey did in Precious.

‘The only person I approached at the BAFTAs was Quentin Tarantino. I said to him, “It’s taken me three glasses of champagne to come over here.” He said, “I saw you perform, it was amazing, I loved it.” And I said, “You f***ing blow my brains out!” Then I said, “I’m sorry I’m not more subtle.” And he said, “No, I like this language.” And then Christoph Waltz said, “I thought you were incredible,” and I just grabbed his face and kissed it 20 times, and I went, “You’re the best actor alive today!” And they were just laughing. Then I said, “The three of us are gonna have such a great time in death because we’re all going to be together in the VIP section of Hell! See you later.” Then I walked off.’

Anyone who’s seen Paloma on telly will know that, if she ever tires of music, she’d make a dead funny presenter. She’s extremely amusing on Never Mind the Buzzcocks with Noel Fielding, and on chat shows such as Graham Norton’s, giving as good as she gets in a verbal sparring with Russell Brand. ‘You just need to feel confident,’ she explains, ‘and I always do. I never have stage fright, ever. I think a lot of people are intimidated by each other, but me and Russell Brand aren’t. A friend who saw my tour said, “Paloma’s shows are half music and half stand-up.” ’

And then I have to ask her about the dove. I heard that a friend once turned up to her birthday dinner and presented her with a live dove, which she wanted to release into the sky. ‘Yeah, she said, “You’re the freest and most beautiful spirit I’ve ever known and I thought we could set it free together.” And I love her to death for that. My name means dove. But I am actually quite logical, so my immediate question was, “Was it born in captivity? If so, it won’t know how to fly properly and it will get run over and die.” ’ After much discussion, and with the dinner party turning into something like a Pinter play, a photographer friend took it home to live in a cage on his balcony.

Months later, he was worried the bird wasn’t thriving, so he asked a bird handler for advice. She turned out to know Paloma, so said she would take the dove. I feel compelled to ask if it died. ‘Died?’ shrieks Paloma. ‘It’s got a job in the West End! It’s in a ballet! She trained it really quickly and found it a job as part of a flock. Isn’t that an amazing ending? Honestly, my life is full of this stuff.’

Paloma will play at the first ever American Express Platinum Cashback Gig, for War Child, at Union Chapel on Sunday at 7pm (ticketmaster.co.uk/cashbackgig) and at The O2 on 7 June (theo2.co.uk)

Photographs by Chad Pickard and Paul McLean

Styled by Orsolya Szabo

Fashion assistant: Anish Patel.

Hair by Eamonn Hughes at Premier Hair using Kiehl’s Stylist Series.

Make-up by Kirstin Pigott at Julian Watson Agency using Rimmel London.

Shot on location at The Rivoli Ballroom, SE4 (therivoli.co.uk)